Showing posts with label Sweetness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sweetness. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 14, 2019

A Song for Water

Millions of raindrops coming from above
Clearing the way for all of us to love
Living, giving beings of crystal light
Returning to the earth to make things right.

Thank you raindrops.
Thank you water.
Thank you raindrops.
Thank you water!

Thank you water for all that you give us.
Thank you water for the life that fills us.
Thank you water for all that you give us.
Thank you water for the life that fills us.

Thank you water.
Thank you water.
Thank you water.
Thank you water.

Thank you water.
Thank you water. 
Thank you water.
Thank you water.

Millions of raindrops coming from above
Clearing the way for all of us to love
Living, giving beings of crystal light
Returning to the earth to make things right.

Thank you raindrops. 
Thank you water.
Thank you raindrops.
Thank you water!

Thursday, November 29, 2018

You Are Needed Here

Your gentle nature is needed here
With all the forces that arise from fear
A sweet smile or a lovely tune
Can shift the mood of any room


Art by Alicia's Infinity


Monday, January 25, 2016

My MRI Experience

I had a large growth on my right hand’s middle finger and the surgeon didn’t know what it was. I already had a CAT scan yet they also wanted me to go for a MRI.  I knew I needed deep emotional healing in order to clear it but hey, I’m not a doctor.

On the day of my MRI, I was not feeling well due to, okay I’ll say it, my period.  I was in pain man - pain.  It was one of the months where my emotions and physical body decided to do a dance with the happy and sad jokers flipping without any notice.  La, la, la, la, el la - not fun.  I’ll tell you again - not fun.

I was not excited about having the MRI.  The hospital insisted that I have a blood test first to check if my kidneys could process the metallic chemical that they would inject in my body.  Yuck, metal in my blood, again not something I wanted to endure.  I’m extremely sensitive to most things and that day I was in no mood to do it.

My energy was low and I was not thinking clearing.  I arrived two hours before my MRI as the hospital requested.  I gave the clerk my form and she looked at me, “aren’t you an early one?”  Yes, but I need a blood test first.  The front desk didn’t have the documents, “once you get the paperwork, come back and I’ll book you in for your MRI.”  I was sent off to another area to get the documents.  I waited patiently for the slip.   The clerk told me to go to yet another area for the blood test. 

The blood test was on the other side of the hospital.  I was feeling awful as I was standing in line holding my paperwork in one hand and my lower abdomen with the other.  I was trying not to cry from the pain.  All I wanted was to be in my bed with a hot water bottle.  (Oh, that sounds lovely even now.)  After checking in at the desk I had to obtain a number.  It’s strange how the system works but at least it works. 

The blood technician just came back from his break and there was one patient before me.  I finally was able to rest.  I noticed a beautiful couple and the woman seems quite nervous but I smiled at her.  I sensed that under her scared exterior was a brave warrior woman.  I felt her strength as she looked into my eyes.  We broken our connection and I went back into my own thoughts.  I looked down at the ground and cried because the pain of my cramps took over.  I had tears coming down my face and yet I didn’t make a sound.   She noticed but didn’t say anything.

The technician jumped out of the room after the patient left and said, “You’re next but could you please wait until I go to the washroom?”

“Of course, please go,” no pee, pee dancing with a sharp needle, not around me. “Go!” 

I sat up and prepared myself for the blood test. I don’t like needles, or any sharp objects around me.  I always turn away when they take my blood.  Most of the time doctors, nurses or technicians can’t find my veins.  I’m a thin woman really you would think there shouldn’t be an issue. Thank goodness this time it was fine. 

After the test, I returned to the imaging area and handed over the original document.  She finally booked me for the MRI.  I was given more documents again.  It was already one hour into my visit at the hospital.  At this time, I was crying and really hungry.  I needed to eat something, anything.  She told me to take those papers to the MRI desk.  I pulled myself together and walked up to the next desk.  I didn’t read them I just handed them over. 

The man behind the desk looked at up and said, “Could you please fill them out?  Please use ink.”

“What else would I use, my blood?” I thought it was smart to say. 

He stared with a blank face, “ink will do.” He had no sense of humour.

I looked for a place to rest and answered the questions, ‘Do you have any metal in your eyes?’  God, I hope not.  Of course they need to know about metal as the test is electro-magnetic.  There were two questions, I was unsure of.  I returned to the desk and asked how I should answer them. He replied, “I don’t know anything about this, I only collect them.”

“Well, I feel so much safer knowing that you have no clue.” I started to laugh.  I snorted.  I guess my nervousness took over.  That’s when I realized he was wearing a blue jacket, he was a volunteer.

He said with a serious note, “women shouldn’t snort.”

“Hey, I’m sexy when I snort! Most people love my laugh.”

He raised his eyebrow and started to chuckle. We exchanged a few more comments back and forth.  I finally asked if I could get some food.  I was getting very dizzy.  “If they told you not to eat then no,” he stated. I was clear to eat: right on.

Off I went in search of food. There were a few food outlets and I walked past them a few times. When I finally made my decision to go to Subway which was near the blood clinic, the volunteer from the MRI department walked toward me and stated, “I left my coat on this end of the hospital.”   

“Yeah, right, you’re following me. I know your type,” I winked at him.  He is about 5’5” and 67 years old.  He stopped and smiled at me. 

“Your name is Naomi, right?”

“Yes sir.”

He grinned, “My name is Ryan Finn but my birth name is Reuben. I’m Jewish but Ryan is a nice Irish name.”

“I like both names,” I looked at him, “and yes, I can see your golden hair.”

He smiled and chuckled once more, “well, my mother said I was golden.”

Again, we tossed a few comments back and forth.  I was feeling very weak and the pain was strong.  

“I really should get my food so that I can go back to the MRI department,” with that he walked away.

I grabbed my food and headed back towards the imaging area once more.  I encountered a woman I knew for 15 years and our children were friends.  Her husband died 8 years prior and the anniversary of his death was soon.   I forgot that she worked at the hospital and of course we discussed why I was there.  “You’re looking very well, Naomi,” she stated. As we were talking the volunteer walked pass us again.  He didn’t have his coat.

“Really, because I’m in so much pain, my period is killing me,” I felt comfortable enough to tell her. 

“You look great. I would never know that you were in pain. How old are you now? I know the boys are 17 years old but really how old are you?” she asked.

I changed my stance and said, “I’m 36 years old.  You know, people are telling me I’m looking younger every year.  I don’t understand it.”

“Well, you look like you’re in your twenties,” she shared.

“It’s nice but my teenage son will not spend time with me. People think he is my boyfriend. That really upsets him,” I forget that this really does upset me too.  “He told me to look more like a mother. He said ‘I should wear overalls’. That’s not a mom, that’s a farmer.  Anyways, I would look younger if I did,” I started to laugh.

We shared a few more details of our lives and she invited us over during the holidays. “That would be nice. I’ll talk to the boys about it.  I have to eat and get back to my MRI appointment.”  We parted ways.

I finally sat down to enjoy my sub.  I finished that baby in a matter of minutes.  I was so hungry I even purchased an apple pie.  It was so good.  I covered myself with my coat and tried to sleep.  The area was extremely busy because there was an entrance to the street and elevators.  There was no peace let alone quiet.

I heard the phone ring at the desk.  Ryan stood up, “Naomi, please come with me.” Oh... I wasn’t ready. I went to the door and he asked a few questions, “Naomi, are you Jewish?”

“Well, my mother is,” we both laughed, “but she was adopted. It’s a long story.”

“How do you pronounce your last name, ‘Ben oh ist?’”

“No, it’s Ben oh wa (Benoist). It’s French.”

“You have an s in your name. What does that stand for?”

“Super” I piped up.

“I know what the s is for. It is for snorting,” he finished.  We both laughed again.

As we started walking down the hallway and Ryan suddenly jumped because a shorter man grabbed Ryan’s arm.  “Short men cause problems,” Ryan said as he measured his height compared to his friend.

“Well, short guys are fun too,” I laughed as I looked down on Ryan since he was shorter than me too.

I got a sideways look from the elderly man.  He shook his head. “If I were only a few years older,” he said. 

I broke out into major snorts, “Older, eh?”

“You’re not supposed to laugh at that.  But that’s okay, it’s endearing.”

We walked through the door and there was a technician standing there. “Who do you have here?”

“This is Naomi,” Ryan introduced me.

“We are not ready for her,” the other man claimed.

“Well the phone rang and I didn’t get it. I assumed you were ready for her,” Ryan admitted.

I had to wait another 30 minutes for my appointment. They gave me a choice to sit in the dressing room or go back to the lobby.  I chose the dressing room.  I really needed to close my eyes and rest.  Ryan seems to want me to come back to the lobby.  He offered his hand for me to shake it.  He wished me all the best and then he gave a dashing smile.

It was a unisex dressing room with individual stalls and a small waiting area.  I finally used the washroom at the back of the room.  In the waiting area, I allowed myself to cry without worrying that someone could hear me.  Then I closed my eyes and hugged my jacket.   Another female patient entered the room with a different technician.  I opened my eyes. They didn’t see me in the chair that was tucked into the corner.  She was instructed to change and remove her clothes and jewellery.  I closed my eyes again.   I didn’t want her to be frightened that I was sitting there.  When she came out of the dressing stall, I said hello.  She just smiled at me and I noticed her knee was bleeding.  From around the corner another staff member gave her some gauze to help clean the blood.

“What did they do to you?” I asked her.  She didn’t answer.

I looked down at the floor.  I felt her looking at me then she asked me why I was there for a MRI.  I showed her my finger.  “They don’t know what it is.” We spoke for a few minutes about her work and her knee issues.   She has a healthcare aid at two different hospitals.  She already had surgery but it is still hurting her.  She works with patients that have knee injuries.  It was ironic to her that hers hurts too.  Part of me wanted to say ‘it’s because you’ve taken your clients pain’ but I kept to myself.  She shared that she was working two jobs because both were really good.  She never takes any time for herself only on her vacation days.  Even with the vacation days she works at one hospital.  She didn’t even take much time off after her surgery. I wanted to say so much to tell her but I knew she didn’t want to hear it.  The technician called her in.

I had some more quiet time to rest and I was relaxing. Yes I knew I was in a hospital, imagine that.  A few more minute passed and I was called into the room.   Once I entered the room I noticed a large machine with a circular opening.  I was still in a lot of pain and didn’t know what to do.  The staff were both men and I had to explain that I was in pain because of my period.  One technician looked at my paperwork and said, “You are here 12 hours early.”

“Oh no… I didn’t realize that I misread the information.”  That’s why the receptionist was rude to me earlier.  “I can come back if I need to.  I didn’t mean to jump ahead of someone else,” I answered hoping that I could just go to home and climb into bed.

“No. No. It happens all the time.  People mix up their appointment times.  We are not as busy as we normally are.  You can have the MRI now.”  The technician looked at my finger and gently moved my hand around.  “You need to lie down and place your hand over this.”  He placed this foam stepping stool like thing on the metal table.  “You need to lie down on your stomach and separate your fingers on each of the steps.”

“Oh sir, I’m in a lot of pain right now.  I don’t know if I can lie down on my stomach.” I tried to explain it to him.

“What type of pain?” he asked.

“I am on my period and I am cramping very badly right now.  I’m not sure how long I can stay on my stomach.”

He was very kind and understanding, “At any time you need to move or go to the bathroom tell us.”  

He grabbed a number of pillows for me to adjust my body so that I was more comfortable,

“Thanks.”

“The test could take from 15 to 30 minutes depending if you stay still.” 

“Okay, I’ll do my best.”  I took a number of deep breaths to relax myself.  That’s when the table I was on moved into the machine.  “Are you okay?  Remember don’t move or we will have to start again,” with that the sound started.  It was a loud hammering noise or more of a heavy dropping of an item over and over again.  My whole body tensed up and I started crying more and more openly.  How did I get to this point in my life where I have to stay completely still? Why do I fight my downtime?  I gave up as the tears were flowing down my cheeks and I couldn’t move to clean them.  I realized that my sensitivity to sound increased even more when I was on my period.  I decided that I would get through this experience as quickly as I could.  I relaxed more and more even though my tears were falling.  I started to sing to myself and that’s when I calm down the most.  All I needed was self-compassion and love.  Once the machine stopped the technician came out.  “You’re all done.  We’ll send the results to the surgeon.  How was it for you in there?”

“I didn’t like it.  I am a singer and sound worker.  The sound felt extremely uncomfortable for me.” I answered.

“Oh, really? We have a number of musicians that love the beat.  Drummers always come out with inspiration,” the second technician said. 

“Well, thanks guys, but I didn’t like it and I am happy that it’s over.”  I replied quickly with a bit of anger that my experience was down played as not possible.  “Can I go now?”  They both nodded and I walked back into the dressing room to get my belongings.  I stopped in at the washroom again before my journey house. 

Once I made my way out into the lobby of the MRI I noticed that Ryan was gone.  I looked down at my feet and decided I’ll head home.  I walked passed the pharmacy, the gift shop and made my way to the main entrance of the hospital.  Ryan was with the other volunteers and I waved at him.  He gave me a sweet grin and nodded goodbye.

I left the hospital knowing that I needed to honour and respect my feelings while I go thought my experiences. I looked at my middle finger and laughed.  It was plain as the bump on my finger I needed to let go of my anger.  Thank goodness that I had my humour that day because I’m normally not very cheerful on my period.  Snort!

Friday, December 18, 2015

Gifts and Signs from the Universe

Yesterday morning before turning on the computer, I was thinking about colour and how important it is to my life. When I wear colour it enhances my mood. I find that different colours create different sensations in heart and spirit. Well, unfortunately, I opened my computer and I was not accepting nor expected that something in the media was bothering me. Yes, I am angry with the wars going on in the world. Yet, I am grateful that Canada opened its doors to the Syrian refugees. That is good.

The story that's hitting home for me is this one. 40 year old woman stabbed another woman in the downtown financial district.

Reason: I knew the 40 year old woman back in high school and she was a kind, loving, and gifted young woman. As I read her story which is similar to my own such as in being in the world of finance and not wanting or feeling like it was working for me. Deep grief hit me.  I felt sadness for the woman who did the stabbing and the woman who died from her wounds yesterday.

I called a trusted friend, Anne James (The Personal Growth Centre), who reminded me to come back to my life. She listened to my feelings of personal disappointment for not speaking up about finding our real voices when we are hurting. She mentioned that she posted this and asked this: "How colourful is your life?" 

Facebook posted from The Personal Growth Centre

Bam! That's what I was thinking about in the morning. That's awesome! I shared with Anne that even my Reiki Master Teacher mentioned years ago to add colour to my wardrobe. It started with my underwear and then to my outer clothes.  I felt wonderful, peaceful, and joyful after thinking and remembering these things.  I thanked Anne and I decided to allow myself to step into my own life and joy again. 


My day turned into a magical experience.  Really!

I had a plan to eat at Annapurna, a vegetarian restaurant, with one of my dearest elder friends, Daya.  We try to meet every other week to catch up and enjoy life together.  I decide that I would wear my green long sleeve shirt, a purple sweater, and my special white to dark pink scarf (I dance with this scarf in nature).  Oh how awesome I am to pull those colours off.

I decided to pull three Ascended Masters cards by Doreen Virtue before head out the door.  I picked "Open your heart to love ~ Jesus", "Purification ~ White Tara", and "You are seeing the situation accurately ~ Horus"  

Okay. Thanks for the information.  I snapped a picture and left them on my laptop.  
My reading from the Ascended Masters by Doreen Virtue, Ph.D.

I was suppose to meet Daya at 11:40am and I was early at the station.  I decided to walk up the street.  I felt a call to walk along a different street and spotted a tree leaning over the sidewalk.  "Hello, dear friend." I said as I touched the tree.  I noticed its serial number 11155 and took a pictures.





Not sure why I wanted these pictures but it felt good.









Image result for Casa Collection 11155 Angel Sitting with Head in her Arms - Stone Optic Light, Height 41 cm
Casa Collection 11155
Angel Sitting with Head in her Arms -
Stone Optic Light, Height 41 cm


As I'm writing this blog I typed this "11155 angel numbers" in google.  This is what I found here on the right. 

OH my Goodness!  So Cute!

At the restaurant, Daya and I discussed our regular topics of food, health, and relationships.  I even brought up the news story I mentioned above and then how Anne reminded me about the importance of colour.  At that point, Daya hands over a pink, purple, and cream bag.  I knew she was giving me another amazing gift.   Inside the colourful bag were notebooks, again, all full of colour and life.  There were 3 different soft covered notebooks within the “Botanical notebook collections” 1) bright orange with pink, and greenish blue flowers, 2) coral with orange and blueish green flowers and 3) light green with cream, pink, and orange flowers.  Plus there was a spiraled notebook with a hard-covered picture of a bright cardinal perched on tree with pinkish white flowers surrounded by a backdrop of green. On the inside of the hard-covered notebook there are two birds: one perched on the bottom left and the other on the upper right.


Special gifts from my good friend, Daya

Inside the hard-covered notebook
Spring Cardinals by Bradley Jackson

“Oh my goodness!”  I was filled with appreciation and gratitude.  “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You have no idea of how important it is for me to see two birds right now.” I said as I bowed by head to her in gratitude.

“I was actually thinking of giving you a plate with two birds side by side,” Daya said with a grin.




Medicine Song Oracle Cards


“Wow. I’ll tell you why it is important to me. Yesterday, I had a call with Brenda MacIntyre, Medicine Song Woman and she did a reading for me.  One card jumped out of her deck and the other one she picked.  The picked card was ‘We are re-awakening – East’ yellow affirmation card with the phrase ‘I am alive.’  The picture is of a purple crane de-attaching from a purple cosmic egg.  The bird is ready to soar and be free.  The card that jumped out of the deck was ‘One door opens – West’ blue visualization card with a picture of a woman voicing herself and speaking to a Thunderbird which clears her path as she speaks her truth.”  I explained to Daya as my heart opened more and more as I spoke.



(Here is a link to these amazing cards: https://medicinesongwoman.com/product/msoc-deck-download )
I'm noticing now that the cards also have matching colour themes of purple, pinks and blue.  Looking back now, I can see the same colours on the bag my friend gave me.  Oh my. This is another magically thing that I didn’t know about until now.)

Throughout our lunch Daya and I laughed and giggled.  There was a moment where Daya had a serious look on her face.  “What? Are you okay?” I questioned her.

“I want to tell you something,” Daya whispered as she put her over her heart. I leaned in to hear her secret. “As I was unboxing the boxes you did for me and I was overjoyed.  I saw the care and love you gave all my precious breakables.  Each time I pulled out an item it was as if I was opening a new present. You placed each item wrapped firmly and safely into the box in different configurations. I am very grateful for all the love and attention you gave them and to me.”

Once more, I bowed my head with appreciation and gratitude.  “You noticed,” as I placed my hands in prayer position between my breasts.  Tears came to both of our eyes.  Daya mirrored me with praying hands and bowed her head.

“Thank you for that. Thank you for you.  You keep forgetting how much love you give to others in all that you do,” she reminded me.  That was an emotionally enriching experience. 

Before leaving the restaurant, Daya connected with a woman while she passed a table.  She ran over to the mini-store picked up something and ran back to other table where the woman was seated.  They seem to be really happy to see each other.  I didn’t want to intrude so I walked over to the mini-store in the corner and picked up a free inspirational card.  “The sincerity of the heart will forever last.” ~ Sri Chinmoy.

(I’ll admit, I didn’t understand what it meant until reading it again today. Oh my goodness.)

After lunch, we took a stroll and Daya mentioned that the woman recognized Daya from her past.  They knew each other over 20 or 30 years ago. The woman makes the angels cards that are on sale in the restaurant.  Wow. That was really cool.  They exchanged phone numbers and will connect very soon.  “How do people recognize me?” Daya asked. 

“It’s your heart. They can feel it.” I smiled at her.

Notice the glasses! Snort!  I get it!  I get it!



As we were walking, I pulled out my cellphone to show Daya photos of my stringed art.  (I didn’t show her the pictures in the restaurant because it is a cellphone free zone and I respect that.) On the street, I shared the story from my blogged from a few days ago. I told Daya I met with Kelly later that week and challenged her to make string art too.  It was a blasted, truly, because I had no idea what Kelly was going to make. 

Daya looked up from the phone and said, “Aren’t you a creative spark?”  She nudged my arm and we continued to walk.

As we walked along our feet took us to a nearby park and we approached a beige bench. On the beige bench there were water droplets.  We both looked up and in the distance on the other side of the park were two benches painted bright blue with white shapes which resembles bubbles or water droplets.  “Let’s go over there” we said in unison.  At that park we noticed how people with dogs were interacting with each other and we chuckled.  “Dog owners always have a way of communicating mainly because they have pets.  Normally people don’t talk with each other,” Daya commented. 

“True, we forget that communication is important in our lives.” I tagged to her comment.  Once more we nodded in agreement.  After a few minutes of chatting she pulled out a flyer to a new market place. “Do you want to go with me?” Daya looked up. I looked at it for a moment, “sure.”

We venture out to a market filled with artisans of different traits: jewelry makers, beauty care products, cookie marker, specialty jams, wood-smiths, and creative photo art.  The list goes on.  I don’t normally buy many items but for some reason I had a push to get homemade specialty chocolate chip cookies, skin cream with sandalwood oil, and apple butter jams.  (Some of these are gifts for people I know.  Hopefully they will not realize it as they read this. Snort!)

Cora's All-Natural Products
When I purchased the skin cream, the woman behind the counter asked me to wait a moment.  “You’re our first customer for today I am giving you a free sample of a luxury dry face wash.” 

“Wow, really?” I don’t purchase specialty products often.  “Thank you very much.  I really appreciate it.”  ‘That’s a bonus,’ I thought to myself, ‘I didn’t expect that.’

The afternoon was passing by and we both needed to get moving.  We stopped into a health food store and she purchased a few items.  We decided to part ways at the subway station.  In the station, I asked Daya to take a few pictures so that I can share my new colourful bag.  “Look, it matches my scarf.”  I smiled ear to ear.  After a few shots with the cellphone she hugged me, “You better send me one,” she said waving goodbye.

“Thanks for today!  I love you!  Get home safely.” we both said the same thing to each other waving farewell.  I walked down the subway stairs and decided to go pick up gifts at a different location. 

Once I arrived at Jane station,  I decided to forget the other gifts and walk towards the Humber River. Along my walk I felt a soft knowing which lead me to a street with a large ascended staircase. Really, I don’t want to walk up there.  Yet, deep inside me I knew I was supposed to go that way.  I did pause a few times along the way to catch my breath.  At the top of the concrete staircase was a street library box.  Oh I love these libraries. 

This is what they look like
but it's not the one I visited.
I looked inside and felt drawn to one book.  I pulled it out, Souls on Fire - Portraits and Legends of Hasidic Master by Elie Wiesel. There was a round circle on cover that said, Winner of the 1996 Nobel Peace Prize.  Cool.  Okay. I didn’t really understand what it meant.  I flipped through the book.  I thought, ‘it doesn’t really give me any insights at the time.” Plus the print was really small.  Nothing jumped out of the book. “I need my glasses to read this.” I said aloud. I was planning on taking the book but I read on the street library box, “Take one. Leave one.”  I didn’t have a book to return to the box.  So I decided to walk away.  I walked down the street and then left along another one.  I felt pulled to make another left at the next street.  I ended up at the bottom of the concrete staircase.  ‘I don’t want to walk up there again. I’ll take a note of the title of the book in my mind.’ I thought to myself.

Cover of the book I found in the street library.
Little did I know the importance of the book until now?! As I am looking at the description on the website, especially as I interpret it as a series of stories that a mystic shares through personal experiences.  Oh my goodness.  Here is the link to the book. http://www.amazon.com/Souls-Fire-Portraits-Legends-Hasidic/dp/067144171X  



Gosh, I turned down another gift from the universe when I walked away from the street library box empty handed.  I believe I do that often. Note to self: Accept gifts from the universe.

Well back to my day, I walked away from the staircase and made my way to the Humber River and the bridge to the Old Mill Inn. The sun was kissing the treetops and I snapped a few pictures of the magical river and surrounding area.  




The view from the bridge was amazing. At that moment, I received a text from my boyfriend, Tom, explaining that his plans for the weekend and upcoming week has changed. He will be home around 6. “Okay,” I texted back.



It was only 3:30 pm, the day was passing and the light was fading.  I needed to use the washroom and decided to go to the Old Mill Inn.  I wanted to have tea and rest my feet.  During the day they have what I thought was a café.  Ha… I was informed that they serve High Tea.  “Sure, I’ll have a tea and a piece of cake,” I said to the waitress.  I followed the waitress to the Tea Room. There were groups of 3, 5, 7 and 9 seated around tables.  On the tables were brass or golden plated serving trays with three layers.  ‘Oh, high tea with cucumber sandwiches, pastries, biscuits and chocolate covered strawberries.’  I realized what I was getting myself into.  I was seated in the corner with a nicely decorated table and everything was placed in the right location: a spoon place above the small plate with the knife on the right and then fork on the left.  Also on the table was a pretty pink and cream poinsettia in a green pot.  


This is the type of poinsettia I had on the table.
I touched the petals lovingly and smiled to myself.  On the small plate was a box of Old Mill Centennial Tea.  


I overheard a waitress say to another table as she was handing them their boxes, “This is a gift to you from the hotel because we are celebrating our 100th year anniversary.” Oh sweet.

I looked at the menu without my glasses I said, “I’ll have the Old Mill Centennial Tea (which is Earl Grey with a hint of Jasmine).  But I really don’t know if I can eat all of the food on those plates.” I looked up at my waiter.  He smiled at me, “Don’t worry I’ll only put one of each on yours.” I looked down shyly. 

After the items came to my table, I grinned even more.  Wow, it’s so beautiful.  I didn’t want to take any pictures because I was alone.  I remembered at that moment I had to go to the washroom.  I asked a different waitress where the facilities were and I sneaked out of the tea room do the deed. Once I arrived back at the table, I took my time snacking on all the goodies.   I couldn’t resist taking a picture of the tuxedo dressed strawberry.  As I snapped the shot, I felt a kiss on my face.  I swear that my decreased mother was kissing me.  I started to tear up.  I always wanted to go with my mother when she was alive.  We talked about it over the years but we never made it out.




I texted Daya the picture from the subway and of the strawberry. I told her that I believe my mother was gifting me with all these beautiful things during High Tea.  How I felt her kiss my face like she did when I was a child.  My friend text back, “that is precious.”

I finished my tea and asked for the bill.  “$28.20, Oh my goodness!  I just spent how much on tea and snacks?”  I looked into my wallet and knew I had enough money to cover it, but to tell Tom what I spent. Ouch.  I became angry with myself, ‘what was I thinking?’  I pulled out the cash and realized I still need to leave a tip.  The waiters and waitresses were so good to me.  They were kind and attentive.  They treated me with respect and I swear they knew it was my first time at the Old Mill’s High Tea.  I decided to leave $37 on the table for them.  Off I went with a smile and a little bit of hint of ‘what did I just do?’

Outside it was a bit chilling and I looked at my cellphone.  It’s 4:15 pm.  ‘I can walk home through the woods,’ I thought joyously.  The thoughts of the cost ran through my mind.  I grabbed my cell to call my childhood friend, Leslie.  We had a plan to meet on Monday.  As I was leaving the message to her walking swiftly through the dark woods, I was crying and trying to justify the cost of High Tea.  I explained that I used the money she transferred for payment for a dress she purchased from me.  I also mentioned that felt my mother kiss me.  As I was crying on the phone, I came across a tree near a bench.  I looked closer through the darkness and there was a white feather pushed into the bark of the tree.  “Oh my goodness, there is a sign that everything is as it should be.” I said into the phone before hanging up.
 
I decided to take pictures of the white feather on the tree.  

I sing to trees.  I dance around trees.  I love trees.  Lately, I’ve been writing, drawing, and posting about trees.  







I even told people about the tree guardians.   I must be doing something right.


A tree guardian
I was hit with a major sense of love and appreciation.  I walked away from the tree along the dark path.  

I drew a pattern of a tree healing and dance I did last spring.

I made it to the open field down by King’s Mill Park.  “What can I do now? How can I show my appreciation for all that happened today?” I said aloud.

I heard, “sing.”  So I sang in the darkness with my arms held out wide.  The sound carried over the field and to the trees.  I spun around and sang to the river.  Again the sound carried across the river to the trees.  I was full of gratitude.  I bowed to the trees and thanked the stars for the gifts for the day.  I finally made it home.

I arrived after 5:30 pm just in time to start dinner before my partner would get in. I opened the door and my son was making chickpeas with garlic and thyme.  It smelt amazing.  I looked down at the boot tray. Oh Tom’s boots were there.  I shouted out to my son, “is it already 6?” 

“Yep. I was hungry so I decided to make something for myself.” He peek his head out of the kitchen.

“That smells amazing,” I answered back.

Tom came out of the bathroom dressed and smiles, “Hey there, I wasn’t sure when you were going to be home.”

“Oh, you got home early.  I though you said 6 pm. It’s only 5:30 pm.” I answered as I leaned into kiss him.

“Yes, I told you I would be home around 5 pm,” he stated giggling to himself, “I just thought you would be home later because you were with your friend.” 

“Oh. I swear it said 6 pm.  I really need to wear glasses more.”  I answered.  Snort!

“I was going to heat up leftovers. Let’s eat I’m hungry.” Tom guided me into the kitchen.

I looked at him with deeply concerned eyes, “I just spent a ridiculous amount of money on High Tea.”  Then I shared the story about my mom and high tea.

He kissed me and laughed.  “Don’t worry about it, honey.”

Throughout the evening, we exchanged more stories of our days.  We laughed at how the universe guides us no matter what we think.  After dinner, I gave my son and Tom the specialty cookies purchased.  The grins on their faces were precious.

After everyone was filled, Tom and I decided to take an evening walk.  Outside as we walked hand and hand, I stopped him.  I looked into his eyes and wholeheartedly thanked him for his love, support, strength, kindness, humour, sweetness and anything that I could think of.  Tears swelled in both of our eyes followed by a tender kiss. We released each other slowly and walked hand and hand to the wooded area.  We chatted more about life, giggled and carried on like two love birds.  It was a sweet day.  I am so grateful that I decided to make it that way. 

Plus, I really need to wear my glasses.  How many more messages do I need from the universe in order to get the message? Snort!  

Here I am wearing my glasses after writing for hours. Yes, I can see better with them.  Snort! 

My son also confirmed as he walked in the door this afternoon, “Thats the mom I recognize. Thank goodness you’re wearing your glasses.”  Snort! Okay, Okay.  I know wear my glasses more.  


Thanks for all the gifts and signs from the universe!

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!